Turning Dread into Therapy

In my last post, I recapped what's been going on with my health, and told you about having to go to the same cancer clinic Momma had gone to. Memories I just didn't want to revisit, even if I wasn't going there as a cancer patient.

I decided instead of dreading the visit, I’d make it therapeutic. I had wanted to do something special for the waiting room where Momma had spent so many hours. Since I don’t knit or crochet like my sister does (she is planning on making a blanket for the chemo room), I decided I would make a tassel for the waiting room. Just something pretty for people to look at and maybe take their minds off the waiting for a bit.

I realized that this trip was going to be a journey of sorts. The first one since Momma's death...and my heart was a mess.

But as I worked on the bird tassel, my heart became more focused on what I was doing for the people who are still where Momma was this time last year.

It became clear to me that if I focused on the hurt that place symbolized, I was going to stay a mess...but as the tassel took shape, I could see how beauty could come of it.

It got to the point where I was actually excited to be able to go and give this to Momma's doctor, one of the most well known and respected oncologists in the South, if not the country. I chose a bird because of the Wings Foundation volunteers...cancer survivors who come to the clinic and serve patients in the waiting room and chemo room. They are so precious, and Momma got to know several of them.

I wrote a card and stuck it in the bag with the tassel, explaining what it was and where they could hang it (I told them my preference would be one of the lamp switches in the waiting room). I meant to take the camera with me to take a picture of the finished product, but forgot in my anxiousness of the morning. Plus it was 6:00 a.m. when we left the house. I am not a morning person. Heh. I gave it to one of the ladies in the office who promised to get it to Dr. Tauer and his staff. She seemed as delighted to get it as I was delighted to give it.

Since I didn't take a picture, this is the inspiration tassel...I just put a pretty burgundy ribbon on the back instead of the champagne and brown ribbons in the picture.

I put one of my business cards on it with a little note on the back saying it was in memory of my beautiful mother. I hope they do hang it where others can see it and know her name.

Some good news that I just found out...my test results came back okay! I will have a follow-up visit on the 24th of August. I still don't know why my heart rate went up so high on the treadmill stress test, so I will discuss that with him.

Thank you all who have been praying for me. I cannot express my gratitude enough.

Hopefully my next post will be the third post about my craft room. When all these tests took over my life, I forgot where I was! :)